If I Fly And You Fly We Will Always Fly Together
by cheekybby
Summary: Sirius Potter has been dreading two days for months. How does he cope when these days arrive? How does he cope when his own twin James junior lies on his deathbed?


**Authors Note** : So in my story Albus doesn't exist. James has a twin called Sirius and Lilly still exists. I own nothing. I am not the genius JK is. I wrote this story for another site based on other people but this is my attempt to make it magical so here we are!

If I fly and You fly We will always Fly Together

As Sirius Potter trudged along the corridor he knew what he was about to do would be very difficult.

His mum Ginny was almost crying already and they had not even got there yet. He could hear his dad sniffing as he walked behind him.

When they got to the room Sirius breathed in and he felt his eyes sting. Slowly he walked into the room.

The only sound was the heart monitor. It was a machine based on the muggle version and Sirius felt like the sound was making fun of him.

The room smelled really clean. Sirius supposed it would as it was a hospital room. A healer offered them a weak smile and then left.

His gaze fell upon the frail figure on the small bed and a lone tear made its way down his cheek. The figure was that of his brother James.

His twin.

"Siri?"

The frailness of his brother's voice broke Sirius's heart just a little bit more and he slowly approached the bed.

"I. I'm here Jay. I will always be here Jay."

He could hear his mother crying in his fathers arms as she held Jay's thin pale hand. James opened his unfocused eyes and looked at Sirius.

"Sit with me."

Tom desperately tried to hold back more tears and he looked at his mother who nodded her head ever so slightly. This hurt Sirius even more.

Before he had been told not to sit with James because he was not strong enough.

Being allowed to do so shattered the 12 year old boy because it meant this horrible illness had finally beaten James and he was going to die.

He shakily climbed up behind his twin and held him from behind . James closed his eyes and whispered what would be his final words,

"I love you Sirius. We will always going to be twins right?"

Tears poured unchecked down Sirius's face and he began speaking to James in a low voice.

"Of course Jay. Nothing will keep us apart. We are always going to be causing bother. How can we not? We are the kids of Harry Potter! Lilly is looking forward to you coming home Jay. She is getting so much bigger!"

The tears continued to pour and Sirius felt sad about lying to Jay but he had to. There was no other option anymore.

James smiled slightly and the guilt Sirius felt eased slightly.

Lilly was looking forward to him coming home.

She just didn't understand that it would never happen.

Not now.

"All the other students miss you Jay. Can't wait to see the Potter twins back in action and Rose had been getting all your notes for you."

Sirius looked at his mum and realised her tears had stopped. He realised James was lying limp in his arms.

Horror filled his veins as he turned to look at he heart monitor.

Flat line.

James, his brother, his twin, his everything, was gone forever.

A memory filled Tom's head. Bill had told him to carry on when he was gone but to think of him when it got hard. He remembered a line James wrote in a song and knew he had written it when he was ill. When he was dying.

If I fly and you fly we will always fly together.

It was for Sirius. Again, telling him to carry on. Even though Sirius would fly in the wind, James would be part of the wind he flew through. A small smile crossed Sirius' wet lips. James was gone but he would forever be part of Sirius.

As Sirius stared into the mirror he knew what he was bout to do would be very difficult. Why did that seem familiar? He was wearing a black suit. It was uncomfortable and for Sirius it felt wrong to wear black. That was Jay's colour.

Jay. God! That hurt! James was gone. He was never coming back. Sirius was alone. Forever alone and that hurt. It was scary. It was everything he never wanted to face.

A pile of papers lay on Sirius's desk. They curled at the edges from being read so much. He hastily shoved them in his pocket and gazed around his room. His room.

He no longer had to share it. He didn't't have to yell at James to tidy his side of the room when they came home from Hogwarts. It was all his responsibility.

There were so many things Sirius now had to do alone. Jay's side of the room was still untouched. His things lay scattered around in disarray. Piles of ironing that was never put away and a glass of water that was never finished.

Ginny had tried to tidy up and move James's stuff out but Sirius had not let her. He had screamed until she had left. He did not want "more space".

He just wanted James back home. As usual he wanted what he could not have. Tears prickled at the back of his brown eyes but he refused to let them fall.

Not yet.

The journey to the church was awful. Sirius received so many stares of pity and regret that he was filled with anger. He missed James, of course, but that did not mean he was any less of a person without his twin.

Lilly clung to him and he was torn between wanting to pull his little sister closer and wanting to push her away and be alone.

People looked at him as if he could no longer communicate with the outside world without his twin. It was hard but he would try. He promised James he would go on but these people were making it very hard.

The church service passed in a blur. Sirius heard nothing. Not the songs that were sung or the passages that were read.

All he could focus on was the coffin that held the body of his other half. It was cold. Like James. James would never be warm again. The tears burned in his eyes harder but he still reused to let them fall.

Sirius and Harry had to support Ginny to go to the graveyard. She was sobbing and could barely stand let alone walk unaided. Sirius was happy to help. It helped him keep his mind off what was happening.

They were about to put his little brother in the ground and cover him in mud.

That would seal it for Sirius. It would really be over if they did that.

The mourners which included family, neighbours and few close friends of James, who had been granted permission to leave Hogwarts for the day, gathered at the grave side. Tears poured down every cheek except Sirius's. The wizard in charge of the ceremony spoke and the wind blew his robes up around him.

It was like something out of a movie. Except this was real. The coffin was lowered into the earth and Ginny crumbled to the floor. Her vibrant red hair stood out from the black surrounding her.

Sirius focused on that to keep himself together.

Sobs were heard from every direction. Eyes turned to Sirius. This was his call. Time seemed to slow down as Sirius stepped forward. His gaze lowered to the oak coffin which held his brother.

Then to the grey tombstone. It was plain and Sirius vowed to visit every holiday he was at home. No matter how much it broke his heart to do so. He read the words slowly.

James Potter Junior

2001-2013

Darling Son

Cherished Grandson

Adored brother

Beloved Twin

Taken before his time

If I Fly And You Fly We Will Always Fly Together

Sirius had made sure that last line was there. It had to be. It was everything James was. A brilliant poet and a gifted flyer.

Sirius raised a shaky hand over the grave and dropped a single red rose into the earth. He figured his mother should be doing this but she insisted he should. He grabbed a handful of dirt and let some of it fall through his thin fingers before throwing it into the coffin.

The sound of the mud hitting the wood echoed in his ears.

He stepped away and two wizards came forward. They levitated more and more mud on top of Jay's coffin. The mourners filtered away until only Sirius and Ginny stood at the grave. Harry led Lilly away and tried to console her.

Even now she didn't understand.

Ginny put her hand on his shoulder and said she would be in the church. He was to take all the time he needed.

Sirius nodded and sat down in front of James's grave. It was over. James was buried. Dead. A shaky hand took the papers out of the pocket. They were poems. Written by James.

He would never speak the words ever again. Never say anything again. Sirius scanned the words which were so deeply emotional for such a young boy. Maybe? Maybe they could be spoken by someone else? He looked at the tombstone. Yes.

These words were too beautiful to go unheard. He would find a way. These poems would be heard by people once more. Just not spoken in James's beautiful voice.

Sirius had to move on like his brother had told him to. He stood up and neatly folded the papers up again and put them back in his pocket. He then whispered him first words since his tirade at Ginny,

"Goodbye James. I love you brother. We will always be twins. I promise. When I fly I know you will be flying with me Jay. Together. Forever. "

He turned away and it was only when he was walking across the neatly cut lawn that he let his tears fall.

**Read and Review. I appreciate it!**


End file.
